No no no, we're not ranking the announcements, We're ranking where and how the chairs announcing the announcements dropped.

Starting with this new Cyclops bot on the way, which they're billing as a scrappy combatant who happens to be armed with a high-powered "Death Ray." Enjoy the trailer here, as they'll be offering ...

Whether it was witty wordplay, crazy hyperbole, the internet again showed that no news is news without a side of humor: "Is he playing the cyclops?," a user joked.

Okay, okay, we're not claiming to be John Mulaney or Hannah Berner, but sometimes you just need a funny joke up your sleeve. Maybe a first date just got a bit awkward and you need a classic dad ...

But the numbers don't lie—our approval ratings are at historic lows, and it's time for the party to face the reality of the situation: we're not funny, we're uptight dorks. We weren't always dorks.